Thursday, May 22, 2008

Top 10 worst ways of proposing

10. Phone, chat room, text message or email. “You want to see this movie again? Okay, by the way will you marry me?”

9. If you give her a box and she sees that it’s empty. And you are saying “just pretend that the ring is in here”. P.S. paper ring also doesn’t work. You can always buy the “real” ring for 5 bucks or so. That way you can replace it later, if you want to of course.

8. Asking the bride's father first will be a mistake. “I wanted to ask your blessing, sir.” “She really said “yes” to you?” “Actually I wasn’t talking to her yet, but…” “Oh, thank God”

7. Asking your best friend to convey the message will be a disaster. “Yeah… and Bob said something about proposing, you want to?” “What?” “So that “what” is like “yes” or “hell no”?”

6. McDonalds way. “Hey, what’s that in your hamburger?”

5. If she is really busy and tired or in a bad mood. And you say “I know that I’m not perfect and you’re not perfect, but seriously I don’t think we can do better, so let’s just...”

4. If you’re saying something like this “You know a lot of girls waiting in a line and they ready to take your place, anyway are you in?”

3. “You are the most beautiful women I’ve ever seen and I really want to get old with you. Kelly, will you marry me? “My name is Molly!” “Potato, potato, so will you?”.

2. Proposing in a public place like a stadium or on TV, for example like Jerry Springer show. “Honey will you marry me?” “Yes, but I need to tell you a little secret, actually I was a man”.

1. You’re with another women, and your girlfriend just came in. And you say “Honey, it’s not what you think. I love you. Really! I can prove it. Will you marry me?”

And remember if you planned every second of that as you call it “proposing day” for almost a year. You reserved a restaurant where you had your first date, bought several thousands of her favorite flowers for each day you was together. And you even got two tickets, so you will be proposing in Paris, spent your one year’s salary for the ring and it’s Christmas time. It’s too perfect. What’s wrong with that? I’m gonna tell you, just don’t waste her time, you’re gay.