This is How You Do Business

Jack, a smart businessman, talks to his son...
Jack: I want you to marry a girl of my choice
Son: "I will choose my own bride".
Jack: "But the girl is Bill Gates's daughter."
Son: "Well, in that case..."
Next Jack approaches Bill Gates...
Jack: "I have a husband for your daughter."
Bill Gates: "But my daughter is too young to marry."
Jack: "But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank."
Bill Gates: "Ah, in that case..."
Finally Jack goes to see the president of the World Bank...
Jack: "I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-president."
President: "But I already have more vice-presidents than I need."
Jack: "But this young man is Bill Gates's son-in-law."
President: "Ah, in that case....."

This is how business is done.

20 Clever Business Signs

1) At an Optometrist's office:
"If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."

2) In a Restaurant window:
"Don't stand there hungry. Come on in and get fed up."

3) In a Podiatrist's office:
"Time wounds all heels."

4) On a Plumber's Shop:
"We repair what your husband fixed."

5) On the trucks of a Plumbing Company:
"Don't sleep with a drip. Call us."

6) Pizza Shop Slogan:
"7 days without pizza makes one weak."

7) At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee:
"Invite us to your next blowout."

8) On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door:
"Hello. Can we pick your nose?"

9) At a Towing company:
"We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."

10) Another Pizza shop slogan:
"Buy our pizza. We knead the dough."

11) On an Electrician's truck:
"Let us remove your shorts."

12) In a Nonsmoking Area:
"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and put you out."

13) On a Septic Tank Truck sign:
"We're #1 in the #2 business."

14) On a Taxidermist's window:
"We really know our stuff."

15) On a Fence:
"Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive."

16) At a Car Dealership:
"The best way to get back on your feet -- miss a car payment."

17) Outside a Muffler Shop:
"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."

18) In a Veterinarian's waiting room:
"We'll be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"

19) At a New Orleans waste disposal company:
"Our business is picking up, but it still stinks."

20) At the Electric Company:
"We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don't, you will be de-Lighted."

Extra: In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
"Please drive carefully. We'll wait."

Extra: At a Propane Filling Station:
"Tank heaven for little grills."